I feel possitively sick to my stomach....

I'm sitting in my room crying because of my mum and sister
basically...
I went to the local college today and applied for a course but because I've been in education before I need to go and get a reference from my old school so I made plans with Karleigh to walk down to the college get her application handed in and then go to the school and get our references done together then we were gonna go back to mine and just doss because to be frank we are both lazy bums but my dad kicked off about Karleigh always coming round I asked why it would affect him if hes at work all day any way so that pissed me off. Then lily started shouting her mouth off at me and just being plain rude I told her to go away and get out of my face cause shes only 7 then my mum accused me of threatening me told me to grow up and stop being pathetic then she GROUNDED ME at the age of fucking 17 I'm grounded!!! So I said well it doesnt look like I'll be getting a reference then does it and she went you wasn't going to any way cause you are a fat lazy cunt who wont do anything with out karleigh holding your hand. I hate being called fat! Especially by my mother! I'm so fucking hurt by it but any way my dad then went on to say you think you are so big and clever well you have got 2 months to find a job or your going I can't fucking put up with you!
I didn't think parents where supposed to have faves but mine so obviously do its unreal and I cant be fucked with them any more the lack of faith they have in me is really upsettingI can't honestly believe my mum would say that but its not the first time she said it she said it a few weeks back as well kept telling me I'm a fuck up and a let down!
No wonder I feel the way I do about my self when the people who are supposed to care about me actually don't
:'(

How rude!

You come over here from where ever you are from and then just bitch about the weather and the NHS
You say "this is ridiculous I'd rather go back to my own country and pay for health care"  So fuck off back there then if you hate it so much! All you do is bitch about the weather too! That's not out fault so don't bitch about us as people about something we can't control
In no way am I racist but it annoys me when things like this happen!!

25th may 2011

GREEEEAAAAT
karleighs got the fucking ump with me cause I went to sort my nan out and left her at home its not my fault they cant stand each other and cant be in the same room!!!!!
I only waited for sme girl to turn up so I could knock her teeth out for messing my nan around and now im in the wrong??
fgs! I'm having a fat day so thats got me down im all jiggly and bloated and ugly :/
FML!!!
ugh i don't even know what to put today my spelling is erratic and my mind is so fucking clouded
FML FML FML!!!
update later
<3

I'm feeling quite low at the moment

I have such high dreams and aspirations and im not helping my self get there
I'm just letting my self get jealous and depressed over people who have got there
but I don't want a man to help me get there i don't want to marry a footballer or a banker just to get some money I want to do it off of my own back

So im listening to the new A7x song and I don't care how childish and immature it makes me seem I'm not ready to accept arin and I will never appreciate their new stuff as much as I do their older stuff but thats just me they will never be the avenged sevenfold again because Jim is not there and he should be
what ever say it all you like Arins got big shoes to fill he should have thought about that before he tried to fill them shouldnt he?
I don't think he fits in at all